Needing Some Angels

Well, my oldest brother with cerebral palsy, Nathan, has been in the hospital for a week. He has double pneumonia, his red blood cell count is dropping, his blood sugar has been bouncing, he hasn't ate solid food in a week or ingested any real liquids other than through an IV... 
Seeing him today in the hospital has brought back too many sad memories. While I love hospitals and am always that kid who is trying to peek into others' rooms, I do not enjoy seeing my big brother lying in a hospital bed, whimpering and moaning in pain and agony, losing weight, unable to do anything. He is the happiest person God created, ever. He doesn't complain, he doesn't cry, he doesn't get angry (often.) He laughs and giggles and is easily entertained. He also has had the worst life medically speaking than I think one could ever fathom. Liver failure, toxic mega colon, seizures, osteoporosis...I mean, he is the perfect example of someone who has just an unfair life. I understand that life was not meant to be measured by fairness and an equality of happiness--but it just doesn't seem right that Nathan, our joy and our miracle, should be the one to suffer! 
I need some angels. I need them to surround Nathan's bed, put their healing hands on him and send him home. I need some angels to guide me as I try to live normally this week, knowing how tired and broken my mother is as she tries so hard to get answers from the doctors and specialists who are in charge of Nathan's care. I need angels as I go into my interview Tuesday in a hospital, knowing the NICU was a large part of Nathan's early life. I need angels to protect my family, protect my marriage, heal my heart, give me joy, give Nathan peace, and again...to send him HOME.
Monday I dive back into school, work, and full nights of preparing and studying for my difficult classes, in particular A&P (2nd exam is Friday...) I hate living 6 hours away from my family knowing they are sad, tired, and confused as to why this is happening yet again to our Nathan. 
Lord, be with me. Be with all of us. My laptop is crashing, dying, breaking, whatever...It's lived 4 years but now is so not the time to do this to me! I am tired, weary, broken for my family. They need rest, we need rest, but most importantly NATHAN needs rest. 
Heal him please...Send your angels, and heal him.

I Surrender All

Today I was blessed with the opportunity to work the morning shift at the vet clinic where I work, instead of my usual shift. Both morning ladies were sick so I volunteered, since there were zero afternoon appointments and that way one of the techs could recep for me in the afternoon. I worked 7-1:30, went tanning afterwards, showered and afterwards I felt so humbled and blessed by God! 
I texted my neighbor Stephanie on my way home, asking if she wanted to run my dogs with me and grab lunch and she said,  "Sure!" I thought, "Wow! I have a friend I can call completely spontaneously, who can hang out!!!" After spending some good time with her, I then got the privelage to meet Jana (sister in law) at Central Park with her daughters and we walked for almost an hour just catching up and talking! It's always a good day when my sweet niece Arie screams in delight to see me and says, "Hold youuu, Ashee, hold YOU!" 
After my walk with Jana, I went to Sunergos Coffee with Asa and met my old roommate/close friend Jill! We've been friends since my freshman year of college and she seriously makes me laugh so hard I could pee my pants. I have always been her "buttercup" who she can "put in her pocket." I love it. 
While "studying" and chatting at Sunergos, I noticed two more good friends whom I haven't seen in a long time: Andy and Charlie Sims. Andy used to be such a big brother to me and his wife Meredith and I used to be great friends and practically roommates also my freshman year of college. Speaking of Meredith, she then entered Sunergos and I sprinted to her (as much as one can sprint in a coffee shop full of bodies) and squeezed her so hard. We were able to catch up briefly, share stories, our hearts...and I realized, all of these close friends of mine are all Christians who adore Jesus; and well, I just feel entirely blessed and in awe of God at the moment. 
I went from a period of longing for deep friendships or just girls that I can talk to and hang out with, and it's like all in one day God fulfilled that desire! 

Thank you, Lord, for being Real, Almighty and Sovereign!

Another Interview!

I wanted to update: ANOTHER recruiter called me and I have a SECOND interview! This position is full time, 3rd shift, being a PCA (Patient Care Assistant) in Kosair as well, in the med-surg unit! Now, this is 40 hours a week so 3 days a week...and head on patient care: changing beds, cleaning patients (KIDS THOUGH!), everything, which would TOTALLY get me ready for clinicals and nursing if that is the route I take.
Basically I need God to COMPLETELY work this one: open one door, close another, open both and let me choose or close both of them! (Ouch. I hope not.)

PLEASE be praying whomever DOES read these facinating blog entries of mine. Both interviews are Feb 2. The NICU is at 9am and the PCA is at 10am! What a full and nerve wracking morning!

I am so incredibly grateful that God is working and everything is moving FORWARD to be potentially having a job in a HOSPITAL! Wow.

Alright...Thanks for reading, whoever you are :)

An Encouraged Soul

I feel encouraged so I felt I may as well share the things I am encouraged by:

• I literally prayed that God would give me Christian girlfriends who just love Jesus and who I can go to and talk to and count on. A few weeks later I met my 2 next door neighbors, both of whom love Jesus, pursue friendship with me (and they are as obsessed with dogs as I am...so that was a huge bonus!) God answered my prayer! 
• I prayed God would give me people to study with who could encourage me and who could meet with me often. Via email, I met several classmates and tonight was our first meeting and it was a huge blessing! I literally failed my first A&P exam, but I feel encouraged that it can only go uphill from here. God answered my prayer! 

• I have been applying to Norton hospital for WELL over a year and Monday night a recruiter called me for an interview. This is a huge deal. I am interviewing Feb 2 at 9am to be a Unit Secretary in the NICU. God completely answered my prayer! [I may not get the job, however, I simply prayed all afternoon on Monday that someone from Norton would please call: and someone did.

Basically, I feel like God has been working incredibly hard to open my eyes to see that He does answer prayer. He does listen, he does care, and even if I continue to fail my exams (which my LORD I pray I don't!!!), even if I don't get this job-->Life will STILL go on and God is AMAZING! I have chills. I am so in love with my Savior. 


I just wanted to share. Thank you, Jesus, for who you are! 

Decoupage: New Thing #1, Month #1

My New Year's resolution was two things: work out at least twice a week at U of L since it's my last semester there and well, I haven't worked out in decades. (Okay that would put me at age 11 so not possible, but still)- and my 2nd was to do something NEW with Asa that we've never done before, preferably crafty things. TODAY we did our number one thing, with time to spare since January ends in one MORE week. It was his idea, so go Asa, to decoupage an old trunk we have that isn't very cute, with our wedding photos!!! We're hoping it turns out incredible, and so far it all looks great! One picture started to bubble tonight, but it looks beautiful, in my opinion. It was fun to do something new and creative with Asa...a great way to get my mind of flunking my first A&P exam and having a pretty weird encounter with someone this past week. 

 

   

  

 

I love him so very much! 

 

 This is pretty much the finished product. We're trying to figure out if we want to do the ENTIRE thing?? Like ALL the sides as well? Not right away. We still have more decoupage layers to add to this surface. I love my family and thank God for blessing me with such a fun husband!

I Won't be Defeated

I am trying not to be defeated. I got 14 out of the 35 questions wrong today... putting me at a 60%, a D. The only time I ever got a D in college was on two economic exams--and I dropped that class after those two exams once I realized business school was not for me! I know I cannot assume the same about nursing... everyone says A&P is not a good decision factor to base the career on. But if I want to do Bellarmine's nursing program, I have to get a B in this class. We are allowed to drop the lowest test grade and use the best 5 out of 6 exams we take...but if this is any inclination to my future in this class, my standards are not high. I am trying so badly not to be a debbie downer. This was the first exam, I had no idea what to expect, she didn't prepare us at all but instead just threw a million pounds worth of information at us, and gave us 35 questions when we had covered 4 chapters. How fair is that? I've emailed several classmates and they have all said they would like to study together before the next test, which is in 2 weeks...so I am begging God to let that happen, and for it to HELP ME!  
Sometimes I wish I was one of those individuals who just "didn't care" about school...it's so hard to care as much as I do, only to be dissapointed after three long days and nights of studying. Maybe she'll give us a curve and I can manage a C- but somehow I doubt it with this instructor!! 
All I know is that I cannot FAIL this class. I have to graduate in May. So I am pleading with God for better insight and knowledge and for Him to guide me through these tests better than what happened today. 

Prayer Request

I have absolutely no idea if ANYONE in their right mind would ever read my blogs. But on the assumption that someone does, I am requesting prayer for my first anatomy/physiology exam that is Friday, Jan 22, at 8am! I get so worked up over tests, especially science ones!!! I have studied probably 3 hours tonight and have a million flashcards to quiz myself over. I am planning on waking up early to study more before work (as Grey's and Private Practice is on tomorrow NIGHT so I want to feel confident before then on this studying stuff!) 

Anyway...again I repeat, what kind of dummy takes A&P I their SENIOR year of college in their LAST semester when they DO NO HAVE TO? At least God may show me early the signs to my future, right? Ha ha. We'll see. 

Goodnight, All!