It's been almost a month since I've written. Since the last post, I have enrolled in grad school and started my online class (taught by Asa's dad!) 3 weeks ago. It is SUCH a change being BACK in school! I'm only taking one class, and I feel like I have so much to do! Asa is taking three and kicking butt and he graduates in December WITH his master's in special education... I have no idea how I'll ever finish the program, because I dread being IN school, and all online course work is SO MUCH! However, I AM enjoying it and I'm learning a lot from the class I'm in. So it's very worth it. I've applied to JCPS for all special education jobs elementary through middle school. I very much doubt I will even get an interview for the county, with me JUST starting and there being so many teachers looking for jobs! We DESPERATELY need Asa to get hired as a salary contracted teacher however... so we could use some serious prayer on that front. Right now he is on my insurance at the hospital, and it would be SO wonderful for him to have is OWN, as well as to be making that type of salary!
Each of the days I come to work, I am more and more made aware that I was never meant to be a nurse. I am so grateful to God for GIVING me this job, opening my eyes and saying, "See?? This is what you would be doing. This is what it is like!" I cannot stand being pulled in a million different directions. I know that as the PCA, I am the brunt of the staff... I do everything, for everyone, no matter what. Sometimes I have 26 patients, sometimes fewer and I realize nurses have 5 or 6 maximum, but they STILL have SUCH a demanding job!!! An IV being pulled out here, a kid needing meds there... I mean, it goes on and on for 12 hours straight! I do NOT do well not knowing where I will be one day, how many kids I will have, what the kids will be like...etc.
The relationships that I do build with certain children, I never want to end. I got SO incredibly close to one 9 year old patient, when I left my shift that night I almost SOBBED because she was being moved the next day. The patient I have been with the past two days I have also gotten incredibly close with. She may be gave up to the state soon after her stay here, and it breaks my heart... But again I can see how God has molded my heart and shown me that the time I have here with them is just not enough... I want to work in a small, intimate setting where I can watch children grow and learn and absorb and turn into the people they are supposed to become. Sometimes, I may get my hair pulled or be kicked or have a toy thrown at me (such as the past two days with this patient,) but the smile on their face, the relationship I would be building... it would all be worth it! I am so so thankful that the Lord has shown me that I DO strive for this.
I can't believe that my sister in law Sarah is due pretty much any day now.. (Due August 12 but hopefully sooner!) And Jana, due September 5, we have no idea really... she may get induced but who knows when. And Ali (Asa's oldest sister) is due December 1. It still blows my mind that all 3 of my sister-in-laws (minus Beth on my side) are PREGNANT! Whew!!!
ALL BOYS TOO! Did I mention that? I am VERY excited to see Sarah with a baby. This will be her first and I just can't fathom! I'm excited for ALL of them, but it's especially fun to see Sarah as a very first time pregnant woman :) She is so cute!
OH! Very special update: our boy Humphrey turned FOUR years old yesterday! July 24 :)
We had a party for him (Asa and our pets and I) and Asa made a homemade cake for him as well as spoiled him with moist dog food. And my Mama of course sent a huge package in the mail with gifts and treats, not only for Hump but EVERYONE! She is the best!! So so sweet.
Anyway, I'm exhausted and staring at a computer screen doesn't help! I have 3 more hours here with this patient and then I am off tomorrow (Monday). I work Tuesday and then I am going HOME TO MICHIGAN until Sunday!!!!!!!! I can't wait to see my Mama. I REALLY wish Asa could come with me... it makes me so sad I'll be away from him that entire week, but oh well I suppose. Ta ta for now!!!! :)