98 Years

January 30, 2011

Even though you have not seen him, you LOVE him. Though you do not now see him, you BELIEVE in him and rejoice with JOY that is inexpressible and filled with glory- 1 Peter 1:8

I'm on Aslan's side even if there is no Aslan to lead it. I'm going to live as like a Narnian even if there isn't any Narnia- The Silver Chair C.S Lewis

Dear Gram,

I have believed in a Savior my entire life, which is a mere 22 years. Sometimes I cannot even begin to fathom what it must be like believing in Christ and professing the name of Jesus for not just 22 years, but for 98. While I realize you did not exit your mother's womb believing or knowing who Christ Jesus is, I know that at a very young age you learned and wanted Him for your own. You have taught your own children and your children's children what the love of Christ means, what it looks like, and to always trust it. I was reading 1 Peter yesterday morning and realized that the reason I find the passage so incredibly beautiful and inspiring, is because it sounds and looks like YOU. “While you have not seen him, you LOVE him. Though you do not now see him, you BELIEVE in him.” I cannot imagine all of the things you have seen in the past 98 years...I remember you telling Sean and I about the time the bobby pin was invented, and about the Great Depression. I used to ask you if you were affected or harmed by the Great Depression and you would tell me all about the farm and how you and your family never had to seriously worry about obtaining food or resources because of it. But I also cannot imagine the scary things you have seen or have been told—and when I try to fathom 98 years, almost a CENTURY, and the events that have unfolded, well, I am constantly reminded that the most important thing about those years is that you have loved and believed in Jesus.

I do not remember if you have read the C.S Lewis series “The Lion, The Witch & The Ward rope,” but they have always been an encouragement to me. Asa's family grew up reading them and when he and I first met, he explained that that series is what helped him greater appreciate and understand what salvation means and what Heaven looks like. One of my absolute favorite quotes from the land of Narnia is the one I wrote above, as I think that it really resembles how I view Christianity and Heaven. I'm on Aslan's side (God's side) even if there is no Aslan (God) to lead it. I'm going to live like a Narnian (Christian) even if there is no Narnia (Heaven) in the end. You are living proof that an individual can have solid faith, everlasting love, and a passion for something that is so clearly NOT just a religion.

Gram, I have told you often, but never enough, that I love you. You are my biggest hero, my inspiration, my hope and the largest reason next to my own mother, that I love God and aspire to be faithful my entire life. You have been so kind and perhaps vulnerable, to let me have or maybe permanently borrow, some of your journals...in these, I only continue to find more and more evidence of a Proverbs 31 woman: a woman who loved deep, worked hard, cared sincerely, and endured daily. I want to share something personal that I read from your entry January 30, 1993—your 80^th birthday:

“It was a blessed time—just one sad time—John couldn't be with me. He would have had his 80^th birthday last June. I know he's happier there in Heaven then he would be at any celebration, but oh I do miss him so much. Sometimes it seems I miss him more—not less.”
Gram, 18 years later and I am absolutely positive you feel the same way. I have never really shared with you how emotional it sometimes makes me to remember that you have been without your John, my grandpa, for 22 years. I was four years old when you wrote that entry in 1993 and today I am 22. As a four year old, I had no idea what loss truly was, sorrow, or what it was like to be without someone that I loved. Now that I have been married for two years, I have come to an understanding of what true love is, Christ like love, genuine and absolute. Two years is not long to be married to someone, but it is long enough that I sometimes will cry over the mere thought of losing my Asa...I say all of this to say, THANK YOU for being strong. Grandma, thank you for not giving up, thank you for holding on, and thank you for loving us the way that you do, even though I do know day by day, life may not get any easier. One last thing from your journal, New Years Day 1990:

“You see, I am just an ordinary person with no great about me, but nevertheless, I am precious in the Lord's sight because He cared enough to die for me.”

If you are “just an ordinary person” than I want to say the deepest thing you have taught me is this: Ordinary people can do extraordinary things, and that is EXACTLY what you have done! You have done extraordinary things for the Lord, for my family, for me personally, for our family's faith, for MY faith, and today, on your 98^th birthday, I want to say THANK YOU for being MY EXTRAORDINARY PERSON!

I will love you always and forever and ever. Happy Birthday, Grammy.

Love,

Your baby granddaughter, Ashley Morgan

January 30, 2011 was my Grandma's 98th birthday, as the letter above states. It was a blessing and a honor to be a part of it. She deserves the world and I am so grateful that she is my grandmother!