Sitting With Jesus

I randomly decided to take a very hot bubble bath tonight after dinner and studying A&P...and I wish I liked baths better, but I unfortunately got way too hot after about 15 minutes and had to rinse off in cold water and get the heck out! 

However, in the midst of the bath, with bubbles almost suffocating me (reminding me of a song I "wrote" when I lived at home w/ my parents about bubbles suffocating me...."You stupid bubbles I haaaate youuuu. I wish you would just go chew goo." Literally...That is the start of the song. Anyway, I digress!) In the midst of the bath while reading Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World [which I've been reading FAR too long because get this, I DON'T HAVE TIME! The author would be dissapointed...] I found a section that talked about Jesus in our hearts, titled, "Making Room for the Savior." Here, she makes reference to another author Munger, who writes about having different rooms in his heart where he invites Jesus to walk around. He welcomes Jesus room by room and when they get to the "drawing room" here is where I want my own heart to be like: 
"The room was rather intimate and comftorable. I liked it. It had a fireplace, overstuffed chairs, a bookcase, sofa and a quiet atmosphere. Jesus also seemed pleased with it. He said, "Let us come together here often. It is secluded and quiet and we can have fellowship together!" Jesus promised, "I will be here every morning early. Meet with Me here and we will start the day together." So morning by morning, I would come downstairs to the drawing room and He would take a book of the Bible, open it and we would read together. He would tell me of its riches and unfold to me its truths...they were wonderful hours together! In fact, we started to call this room the 'withdrawing room.' It was a period when we had our quiet time together. Little by little, under the pressure of many responsibilies, this time would be shortened...I began to miss a day now and then...I would miss it two days and often more. One morning while in a hurry, I passed the drawing room and the door was ajar. Looking in I saw a fire in the fireplace and the Lord sitting there. "Blessed Master forgive me! Have you been here all these mornings?!?" "Yes," He told me. "I told you I would be here every morning to meet with you." Then I was even more ashamed. He had been faithful inspite of my unfaithlessness. I asked His forgiveness and He readily forgave me...Jesus said, "The trouble with you is this: You have been thinking of this quiet time as a factor in your own spiritual progress, but you have forgotten that this hour means something to Me also." 


Jesus longs to spend time with us. I have been struggling recently with the message of baptism and what it means for actual salvation. I mean, I was in literal tears recently because I thought I was on the wrong page and misguided... after vigorous study with my husband and conversation with friends, I have realized that God is above all gracious and good and HE will speak to me heart. He is SO excited over the fact that I am studying and researching and getting the answers for MYSELF. It is amazing how once I have started to study something, I just want to continue and I want to learn more! My husband is so sweet to say, "What do you want to study together now?" 
I have busy weeks filled with studying, work and enjoying my marriage. But God is SO serious when He says that HE needs time with us as well! When my quiet times begin to diminish, it is amazing to see how quickly I can forget His scriptures and what He says for us to be His followers! I am so grateful for books like Joanna Weaver's to bring me back each time...and I am so grateful for my Lord who gave me His word to fall more and more in love with each day.

God Answered

The decision has been made!!!!!! I had the interview mentioned in the last post, and I actually got a phone call that evening while I was at work, that Shelli the RN Manager who interviewed me, was "incredibly impressed and drawn to me," so they offered me the job! I had prayed that God would give me whichever job HE wanted for me, and whichever one would be the best fit. So: I TOOK IT! I start March 15th, which is perfect because that's the week of U of L's spring break, so I'll have orientation every single day that week but no school to worry about! And then by the time classes begin March 22nd, I'll have exactly a month left of school. I am so excited. I could not believe that I was hired that quickly...Terri, the recruiter who spoke to me, said it's incredibly rare that one gets hired so quickly after an interview! God is doing something in my life! This will be the perfect position to show me if nursing is the career for me. [Well, contigent on me passing my nursing pre-reqs as well...] But still! I am incredibly excited. I told my current job, the vet clinic, and they were amazing. Lauren, the manager, was so supportive and sweet...easy to talk to and she gave me a big hug! And Dr. Vaughn was also incredibly supportive! 
What an exciting chapter. I will be working with doctors and nurses and CHILDREN and their families! I cannot wait to be a witness and express my joy for Christ!!!!!!!!!!

Also, another answered prayer: Nathan is out of the hospital and HOME! He was discharged last night and he is SO happy to be home! He was there for 11 days! I am so relieved that he and my mom got to sleep in a REAL bed last night! Praise Jesus! I am so grateful for the blood of Christ and Redemption. It has been fascinating to see Him move so quickly the past week as all my brothers and sisters in Christ came together and lifted up our prayers! I know adjusting to this new job will be difficult and even very stressful, as working 12 hours nights will be something BRAND NEW for me. I pray that I manage my emotions well and that Asa and I will be strong and adjust in good timing. I am so in love with my husband, who has been so supportive of everything!!!!!!!

A Time to Wait

There is a time for everything, including a time to wait. In Exodus, God did not lead the children of Israel directly to the Promised Land, instead it was more of a detour... 
In that detour however, God showed us 4 important things: 1. His guidance is always possible 2. It is sometimes perplexing 3. It is personal and 4. It is progressive. 

I have no idea what will be the outcome of the 2 interviews I had this morning with Kosair. Nor do I know which one will be the very best for me! The PCA position is going to be hands on, patient care: great for a peek into the life of a real nurse! The unit secretary is in the NICU, and as soon as I stepped into the NICU... I thought, "I love it here." The teeny, tiny babies were barely big enough to fit into my own child size hands and I was in awe. However, the nurse manager told me it was only 12 hours a week (one night) and that I could pick up any hours extra that were available. The starting pay is $11 plus a 15% increase for 3rd shift...so I just don't see how 12 hours would fit Asa's and mine lifestyle...unless I was guaranteed to pick up at least one more night. Both nurse managers in each unit were incredibly nice...the PCA position however is 36 hours a week, 3 nights, with a commitment to working every 3rd weekend (Friday and Saturday back to back.) The PCA sounds more intimidating, scary, nerve wracking and energy demanding...but again, a real glimpse into hands on nursing.
The nurse manager in the PCA interview sounded more proactive...she was in the last stage of interviewing, whereas the NICU nurse was in her very first stages...So they are at two completely different spectrums and I seriously have no idea what to expect. So: I will expect nothing. I will pray and be diligent in trusting my Father to do whatever His will is. Which one do I want? I honestly have no idea on that either...again I felt more "at home" in the NICU? Like it could potentially be "my niche?" But what do I know? I am going to celebrate in the fact that I just had two job interviews today...I prayed that someone would call me for a face to face meeting, and God made that happen the next day.
Now, I just pray that HIS will be done and not mine. I will work full time or I will work 12 hours. After getting into Norton/Kosair, I can pretty easily move around to different positions...so who is to say I will not start somewhere and end up somewhere different in several months? God is Almighty and in control of this situation, just as He is in others!  


God's reasons for detours are clearly to protect us from danger and to develop us. My heart could want one thing and God's could be saying a completely different thing. I will promise not to fear or panic or feel trapped in whatever decision HE makes for me. I could be offered both or neither or just one. I must wait and trust.